This Santa is ticked off! You think you got it bad? All night long I deal with soot in the chimneys, smelly socks, cross dogs, getting shot at, mistaken for a stork, driving all night in the snow - damn near got killed by a 747. Mrs. Clause is pissed off cause I got in so late.
Donner and Blitzen and Rudolph got the "runs" over Albuquerque and you should see my suit. The freaking elves won't clean the sleigh unless I pay them double time.
I'm so sick of cookies and milk, I could vomit. The only highball I had all night was when I slipped getting out of my sleigh
My prostate is giving me hell. I peed my pants at 20,000 feet and froze my butt to the seat. I'm allergic to pine needles. I itch all over and I think my hemorrhoids are back.
HO! HO! HO! A very MERRY CHRISTMAS,...NOT! Santa
Action/Cut Directing Seminars - Directing film and TV workshops: weekend workshops with director/writer Guy Magar on the directing process for filmmakers, directors, writers, producers, actors, editors, cinematographers, production staff, and film students.
American Film Institute - AFI's Center for Advanced Film and Television Studies features graduate programs in cinematography, directing, editing, producing, production design and screenwriting.
APA International Film School - Offers course, location, and contact information about training and certificate programs. Artarmon, Australia.
Australian Film Television and Radio School - Australia's premier film school with 100s of pages of information on courses and services, online library, and Quicktime movies.
Brighton Film School - UK-based theory and practice of film production. Filmmaking and moviemaking courses, advice, techniques on how to make, produce, direct, shoot, light and edit films and movies.
Brooklyn College Department of Film - Offers a B.A. program in film production, screenwriting, film studies, producing and film marketing; 2-year Certificate program in film production.
Center for Digital Imaging and Sound - This private college in Vancouver offers diploma programs, certificate programs and part-time courses in 3D animation, recording arts, digital film, visual effects, new media, video game production, web design and video production.
The College of Santa Fe: Moving Image Arts - Offers full film/video/digital production equipment and facilities, classes screen in 35mm, history, theory, critical studies, and writing.
Columbia College - Hollywood - Offers Bachelor of Arts degrees in Cinema and in Television/Video Production. Programs, admission information, tuition, and background information.
Concordia University Cinema Department - The Mel Hoppenheim School of Cinema at Concordia University, Montreal, Canada, offers three main areas of study: animation, film production, and cinema studies.
Digital Film Academy - Offers workshops in screenwriting, directing, camera, and editing; includes course, staff and contact information.
EICAR Film School - A private college, situated in Paris, offers a curriculum based on state-controlled educational programs for the advanced study of cinema techniques.
Film Design International - Offers art direction courses at Pinewood Film Studios with Terry Ackland-Snow. Course information, tutor biography, and registration details. Located in Buckinghamshire, England.
Film Program Cannes - Professional film school located in Cannes, France. Curriculurm, tuition details, calendar, lodging information, application form, media, and links.
Film School Online - Learn filmmaking with online courses in screenwriting, directing, cinematography, editing, producing and digital video.
Film Studies Division--Univ. of Utah - The Film Studies Division at the University of Utah offers B.A. and M.F.A. Degree programs with courses in film/video production, computer animation, screenwriting, and Film History.
Flanders Script Academy - Belgium's premier training facility for both professional and amateur scriptwriters for film and audiovisual production.
FSU Film School - The official web site for the Florida State University School of Motion Picture, Television and Recording Arts (The Film School).
Global Media Adventures - Journalism and documentary filmmaking program in Samara, Costa Rica,.
Gulf Islands Film and Television School - This hands-on residential media training centre is located on Galiano Island, BC. Detailed school information is available, as well as registration help, student films, resources for filmmakers and GIFTS merchandise.
Hollywood Film Institute - Independent film school offering courses for both industry professionals and neophytes. Curriculum is designed to build upon the core 2-day film school program.
International Film and Television Workshops - Education in film, video, digital media, directing, editing, producing, screenwriting, documentary, and cinematography. Workshops, Master Classes, and professional training.
International Film Seminars - Presenters of The Robert Flaherty Film Seminar in New York. Provides information on the seminars, scholarships and archive of their projects.
London Film Academy - Industry professionals teach courses in this vocational approach to filmmaking. Graduates can earn a Film-Making certificate.
The London Film School - Registered charity offering two-year MA degree program in filmmaking.
The Los Angeles Film School - The Los Angeles Film School offers a year long hands-on training course in filmmaking.
Metro Screen - Metro Screen is a production and training facility catering to emerging film, video and multimedia producers. a non-profit organisation supported by the Australian Film Commission.
Metropolitan Film School - Offers digital filmmaking courses; aimed at inspiring and developing independent filmmakers. London, United Kingdom.
Mini Mogul Enterprises - Home of the Lee Garmes Cinema Institute and Movie Pubs, Mini Mogul Enterprises trains and franchises film executives and producers for the future and for the digital-delivery entertainment industry upon us.
Moonstone International - Training courses for feature film writers and directors in consultation with the Sundance Institute
Motion Picture Institute of Michigan - History and information on the organisation as well as details of its one year program in Production and enrollment information.
Motion Picture Pro - Direct, produce and write films using professional cast and crew to produce your project.
New York Film Academy - Film school offering intensive workshops and summer programs covering screenwriting, directing, cinematography and editing.
New York Independent Film School - Provides information on the faculty, the courses and how to apply, as well as showing student work online.
Northwest Film Center School of Film - Based in Portland, offering a range of courses and workshops. Details of each course are provided with an enrollment form, as well as information on the organisation, scholarships and equipment.
NYU Department of Film and Television - Provides information on the courses, details of staff, students and alumni, production resources available, special events and projects and admissions information.
Piedmont Community College - Film and video production program. Programs, projects, and contact information.
Prague Film School - Describes film workshops, semester and year-long programs of the non-accredited film school in Prague, Czech Republic.
Queensland School of Film and Television - Provides information on the school, details of the courses offered, enrollment request form, and an online screening room showing students' work.
Rick Schmidt's Filmmaking Workshops - Details of the workshops as well as information on Rick's career in films, FAQs about getting into films and features on cinema.
Seattle Film Institute - Offers full-time and part-time classes in all aspects of film production, screenwriting, and digital video. Programs, faculty, student profiles, and registration information.
South Seas - Film and TV school located in Auckland, New Zealand, offering several diploma courses.
Summer School in Film making - Course details, prices and application form for this course taught at the University of Melbourne, Australia each January.
Sydney Film School - Private film school in Australia, focusing on 16mm film and digital technologies.
Tinseltown Online Seminars - Short courses on various aspects of the entertainment industry, including sending out a script and putting together a reel.
Toronto Film College - Career college offers training in the film and television industries by teaching the practical skills and artistry involved in creating films and videos.
UCF Film Program - The film program at the University of Central Florida offers majors in film production, screenwriting, and cinema studies.
UCLA - Professional Programs in Screenwriting and Producing at UCLA is a graduate level certificate program. Course description, admission forms, and faculty.
University of Edinburgh - Film Studies - Offers postgraduate courses (Masters and PhD) and scholarships. Information on facilities, content of courses and contacts.
University of Southern California School of Cinema-Television - Offers information on admissions, academic programs, faculty, and resources for the undergraduate and graduate programs in screenwriting, producing, critical studies, and directing.
The USA Film School - A 40 hour, full immersion crash course in filmmaking. Weekend hours and for beginners, intermediate and advanced workshops. Make a class film with professional equipment. Free intern placement program.
Vancouver Film School - Vancouver Film School offers full and part-time courses in film, acting and writing for film and television, new media (including web site design, CD-ROM authoring, digital audio, video and graphics), 3D and classical animation.
Victoria Motion Picture School - Vancouver Island's Premiere Training Facility for the Motion Picture Industry.Offering full-time courses in Film Production and Acting for the Screen.
Video Symphony - Provides information about film and production programs, course schedule, and contact information. Burbank, California.